Chapter 3 of the book:
The Failure of the Great Amish and Conservative Mennonite Dress Experiment
Why Christian Conservatism Isn’t the Answer and What to Do
One of the big failures of the Great Amish and Conservative Mennonite Dress Experiment is that in spite of its very strong focus on women dressing modestly to prevent men from falling into sexual sins, it has not prevented the awful sin and crime of sexual abuse of Amish and Mennonite boys and girls. Instead, the Amish and conservative Mennonite dress experiment appears to be a major contributor to the sexual abuse, which we will look at in more detail later.
Are you looking for something more than just the same old concepts, interpretations, explanations, and perspectives you have heard regurgitated over and over again? This website will give you some new insights and things to think about. You may not agree with everything you read, but Biblical Research Reports will stimulate your thinking. Our goal is to help you to formulate in your own mind what is Jesus’ truth as you look at the research we share on the various subjects facing the Church.
The belief and teaching that modesty will prevent sexual sins is a major part of the Great Amish and Conservative Mennonite Dress Experiment, and that is why the Experiment’s failure to prevent sexual abuse is so significant. It is drilled into girls and women, from little up, the need to need to dress modestly. Their dress styles are strictly controlled, as well as the length of the dress and sometimes the sleeves, to ensure that they are modest. The women are held responsible to dress “right” to keep men from looking on them and lusting after them sexually.
However, in spite of the strong focus on modest dress, sexual abuse is occurring among Amish and conservative Mennonites at a much higher rate than what most people have any idea is happening. In some communities and congregations it is reported that sexual abuse is rampant.
Hidden wickedness in the church is nothing new. Many years ago, in a vision, God directed the prophet Ezekiel to dig through a wall in the Temple and showed him the great wickedness that the people of Israel were committing in secret. Ezekiel describes this experience:
“He said furthermore unto me, Son of man, seest thou what they do? even the great abominations that the house of Israel committeth here, that I should go far off from my sanctuary? but turn thee yet again, and thou shalt see greater abominations. And he brought me to the door of the court; and when I looked, behold a hole in the wall. Then said he unto me, Son of man, dig now in the wall: and when I had digged in the wall, behold a door. And he said unto me, Go in, and behold the wicked abominations that they do here. So I went in and saw; and behold every form of creeping things, and abominable beasts, and all the idols of the house of Israel, portrayed upon the wall round about. And there stood before them seventy men of the ancients of the house of Israel, and in the midst of them stood Jaazaniah the son of Shaphan, with every man his censer in his hand; and a thick cloud of incense went up. Then said he unto me, Son of man, hast thou seen what the ancients of the house of Israel do in the dark, every man in the chambers of his imagery? for they say, The LORD seeth us not; the LORD hath forsaken the earth.” (Ezekiel 8:6-13)
In the next number of chapters we are going to “dig through the wall” like the prophet Ezekiel did and take a peek at some of the abominations that are being committed by piously dressed Amish and conservative Mennonites in secret. The evidence presented is heavily documented so that you can verify it for yourself.
The sexual abuse of children is both an awful sin and a heinous crime here in the United States. What many people do not realize is that sexual abuse affects the victim emotionally very deeply, and that is why it is referred to as trauma and abuse. The trauma of sexual abuse can affect the child, both boys and girls, the rest of their lives. It can affect their relationships with others and often affects their marriage and their sexual intimacy in marriage. It may affect their health.
Jesus put the sin of sexually abusing children in the church in a special category all its own with “special” punishment for the sexual molester. A sexual molester may be able to avoid prosecution in the court system. They may be able to cover it up in the church or get away with a small “slap on the wrist”. But they can’t hide it from God and escape His punishment. Jesus explained the awfulness and seriousness of the sin of sexual abuse when He said: “But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe unto the world because of offences! for it must needs be that offences come; but woe to that man by whom the offence cometh!” (Matthew 18:6-7)
Just like Ezekiel had no idea what his people were doing in secret, most people have no idea of the extent of the wickedness that is occurring in secret in many Amish and conservative Mennonite homes and churches. Many, innocently, would vigorously deny the extent of what is actually happening, but denial does not change what is happening in secret. The prophet Isaiah tells us: “Woe unto them that seek deep to hide their counsel from the LORD, and their works are in the dark, and they say, Who seeth us? and who knoweth us?” (Isaiah 29:15) God does see in the dark and He sees the wickedness that is being done in secret in Amish and conservative Mennonite homes and churches. This includes wicked acts by some of the most pious and respected men and church leaders in the community.
Amish and conservative Mennonite women do not dress in a sexually provocative way. People’s attention is drawn to them because of their unique old fashioned dress styles that are significantly different from the rest of society, not because they dress provocatively. People drive great distances to Amish country and spend billions of dollars each year on vacations to look at these people as an entertainment attraction.
I grew up in a more “liberal” conservative Mennonite church, but not in a Mennonite community. I was not aware of the sexual abuse and sex before marriage that was occurring in some of the more conservative areas.
In her book Sexual Abuse in Christian Homes and Churches (Printed by the Mennonite publishing house – Herald Press, Scottdale, PA 1993 p.73,74), Carolyn Holderread Heggen, whose counseling practice consists mostly of adult survivors of sexual abuse, writes:
“As is true of men raised in any environment which tends to repress sexuality, men in conservative religious homes are often obsessed with sexual thoughts and feelings but rarely share these with others. Because they may consider sexual thoughts dirty and sinful, they become ashamed and afraid of them. The more they try to repress these powerful urges and thoughts, the more powerful they become. Sexual feelings and thoughts may seem to take on a life of their own, which feels out of the control of the legalistic Christian man.
“And so the circle becomes vicious. The more the man thinks about sexual matters, the more shame he feels. The more shame he feels the harder he tries to repress and deny these feelings. The more he tries to repress and deny them, the more energy they have. And then the more shame he feels, and the harder he tries to deny the urges, the more powerful they become, and on and on.”
These two paragraphs describe conservative men who are trying to live the Christian life in their own strength and not in the power and victory of the Holy Spirit. With their conservative Amish or Mennonite regulation dress they can walk the walk and talk the talk, while hiding their sin.
Child Sexual Abuse is a Crime
Let us be perfectly clear. Child sexual abuse is first and foremost a crime, both here in the United States and in many other countries, and those that sexually abuse a child are engaged in a criminal activity that is awful and disgusting. Churches and pastors do not have authority from the government to judge, prosecute, or dismiss a child sexual abuse crime. Over and over, we find churches and church leadership downgrading sexual abuse from a crime to an offense and then addressing the sexual abuse from only an offense perspective and not reporting it to the government authorities. In many cases, a church handling child sexual abuse in-house and not reporting it to the authorities is also a criminal activity.
The Church, Law, and Tax Website states:
“Every state has a child abuse reporting law that requires persons designated as mandatory reporters to report known or reasonably suspected incidents of child abuse. Ministers are mandatory reporters in many states. Some states exempt ministers from reporting child abuse if they learned of the abuse in the course of a conversation protected by the clergy-penitent privilege. Ministers may face criminal and civil liability for failing to report child abuse.
“It is common for ministers to learn that a minor is being abused. This can occur in a number of ways, including a confession by the perpetrator, or a disclosure by a friend or relative of the victim or perpetrator. Often, ministers want to resolve such matters internally through counseling with the victim or the alleged offender without contacting civil authorities. Such a response can have serious legal consequences, including the following:
“Ministers who are mandatory reporters under state law face possible criminal prosecution for failing to comply with their state’s child abuse reporting law;
“Some state legislatures have enacted laws permitting child abuse victims to sue ministers for failing to report child abuse; and
“Some courts have permitted child abuse victims to sue ministers for failing to report child abuse.”
http://www.churchlawandtax.com/cltr/2013/july-august/2013-child-abuse-reporting-laws-for-churches.html
Sexual Abuse Statistics among the Amish and Mennonites
In society as a whole, it is estimated that only a small percentage of sexual abuse cases are ever reported. That is also the case in Amish and conservative Mennonite groups as well.
Because many of these churches tend to handle sex abuse cases themselves and not report them to the police, it is hard to get statistics about how widespread sexual abuse is among these groups. In many cases, everything is kept quiet and swept under the rug, or it is denied that it happened and very few people find out about it. It is very embarrassing to the church leaders to have this type of crime and sin happening in their church. My prayer is that this will change, and that people will see the importance of exposing sexual abuse so that it can be eradicated from the church, and victims can be given support in finding healing.
There are some sexual abuse statistics available among more liberal Mennonites. Mennonite Central Committee in their April 2010 Women’s Report had these statistics:
“According to Church Member Profile 2006, the percentage of Mennonite Church USA members who ‘have experienced any type of sexual abuse or violation’ is 21% for women and 5.6% for men, with most of this abuse occurring while they were a child or teenager… In society at large, the figures range from 17-25% for women and 3-16% for men, depending on the study and how people define sexual abuse or assault.”
These statistics are for the Mennonite Church USA denomination, which today does not have regulation garb, but dresses much like the rest of society. The first thought, from a conservative Mennonite or Amish mind, would be that these statistics show that dressing like the world results in the same statistics of sexual abuse as the world and that it validates their conservative regulation dress. That is, until one realizes what some of those homes were like where the sexual abuse occurred. These statistics are for adult men and women, with most of the abuse occurring when they were a child or teenager. This places many of these sexual abuse cases back quite a few years ago when a number of those Mennonites dressed in regulation garb. In addition, one of the characteristics of more liberal Mennonite groups is that they tend to grow by people from more conservative Mennonite and Amish churches joining them. Just because a current Mennonite Church USA member does not dress in conservative regulation garb does not mean that they did not grow up in a conservative home or have conservative relatives. Therefore, a significant number of these cases may have occurred in homes where Amish or conservative Mennonite regulation garb was worn.
It is sad that the rate of sexual abuse among both women and men in the Mennonite Church USA churches is no different from those who are not Christians. However, what is even sadder is that it is highly probable that the rate of sexual abuse among some Amish and conservative Mennonites groups is significantly higher than among the rest of society from the reports in a number of sexual abuse cases we will be looking at.
Trudy Metzger shares about the rates of sexual abuse among Amish and Mennonites. She had attended a seminar put on by a licensed Christian counselor who works with Amish and Mennonites both in Canada and in parts of the U.S. She says:
“The counselor kindly but forthrightly addressed the ‘higher than average’ rates of sexual abuse in the plain cultures, and stated that the more ‘closed’ a culture, the higher the rates of sexual abuse. With sin and abuse covered and hidden in silence to protect image, it is the perfect hideout for a perpetrator, he explained. What was more, in many of the cases he was involved with the victims suffered severe discipline at the hands of the church, when they exposed the abuse. They were accused of anything from ‘causing discord’, to lying, to receiving the blame for the immorality of the perpetrator. To silence the victims, churches excommunicated them or put them on probation.
“Having heard this, a Mennonite preacher stood to his feet during the Q & A session, to contest the ‘misrepresentation’ of the severity of the problem. Wearing plain suit and all, he defended the Mennonite church, calling it an ‘unjust accusation’.
“The counselor calmly stood his ground, saying he could only present the facts as he knows and sees them, and that it is not intended to harm or hurt the culture. He was there to offer help.
“The preacher proceeded to ask the counselor to change his statistics, and say that, ‘they are as bad as other cultures’ and drop the ‘higher than average’ statement.
“The counselor was gracious and said, ‘Ok, for the sake of argument, we’ll say they are as bad, and we won’t say they are worse.’
“With it being an open forum, I rose to my feet and shared my story, the 3-minute version. I was abused, first at home in early childhood, and again, later, in the Mennonite church by a leader’s son. The same young man also violated other young people. This too was covered up. I told how, after I opened up about my story, about sixty of my friends in the Mennonite church admitted they were sexually abused or raped from within the church. I shared, without graphic detail, this tragic reality and the frustration we, as victims experience at not being able to find help easily. I was not harsh or accusing, but I was honest.
“When it was over, I walked over to the Mennonite preacher—who happens to be an acquaintance of mine—and sat down beside him. I told him that my intent was not to hurt him or his church, and I pled with him to stop living in denial about what is covered up in the church.
“The preacher sat there quietly for a while. I presumed he was loading his spiritual gun to attack me and put me in my place. I had, after all, abandoned their denomination and was viewed, by some, as someone who had abandoned my faith.
“Instead, when he finally looked at me, his eyes were filled with shame and sadness. ‘I am a perpetrator,’ he said, ‘I abused a child.’
“Shell-shocked is the best way to describe what I felt at that moment. He, a perpetrator, was openly defending the culture. And I knew that his wife was one of the many victims in the culture, who had struggled for many years, never quite able to find freedom…”
Trudy goes on to say: “When that preacher stood to his feet and defended the culture, I thought he did it out of sheer ignorance and the genuine belief that abuse is virtually non-existent in the culture. I quickly discovered that it was a desperate attempt to protect what he wanted sincerely to believe about the culture, against better knowledge. He was overwhelmed at the thought that countless others like him, carried this secret, that countless other victims carried the damaging impact for life. He didn’t want to believe it could happen. Willed himself to believe it.
“If he was the only one, he could ‘manage’ the problem. If there were a few others, he could make an impact. But if countless perpetrators filled the seats of churches, and countless victims sat interspersed with the perpetrators, it changed things dramatically.”
http://trudymetzger.com/2012/07/16/sexual-abuse-violence-a-pastors-honest-confession/
Another lady shares this about the rate of sexual abuse among the Amish and conservative Mennonites: “While I was at SMBI [Sharon Mennonite Bible Institute], quite a few years ago, I ran into a teacher and his wife who both actually had a degree in counseling and psychology and had worked to integrate it into their conservative faith. They had done a good job of it. One of the issues he and his wife deal with is sexual abuse. He gauged, based on what he had encountered, that within the Amish-Mennonite communities, the prevalence of sexual abuse was as high if not higher than in mainstream culture. Some communities are riddled with incest.”
http://modern-parables.blogspot.com/2007/01/sexual-abuse-amongst-amish-and.html
Asher Witmer writes: “One in three women are sexually abused. My Dad has been a conservative Mennonite pastor all my life, and throughout the years of counseling that he and Mom have done, I remember them commenting how that statistic has proven true even in the churches they’ve pastored. I don’t think just because you wear a plain suit means you’re not full of lust.”
www.asherwitmer.com/why-im-mennonite-and-why-thats-not-the-point/
“Sexual abuse doesn’t happen in our community”
A likely response by many, when hearing about the high rate of sexual abuse among Amish and conservative Mennonites, will be to state confidently: “Sexual abuse doesn’t happen in our community.” Ann Peachey Detweiler in the article, 10 Myths about Sexual Abuse in Anabaptist Communities says: “I’ll admit that when I hear this one, I usually chalk that community up as being infested with sexual abuse. Some Anabaptist communities don’t have as many cases, but it’s safe to say that those communities are in the minority. When people refuse to talk about abuse, (its effects, the symptoms, etc.), it thrives.”
Conservative Mennonite children in their conservative modest dress are at a higher risk of being sexually abused by someone in their home, extended family, or their church than what most people would ever imagine possible.
Sexual Abuse of Males in the Mennonite Church
Trudy Metzger, who works primarily with conservative Mennonites, has this shocking report:
“When I started into ministry, back in 2010, with Faith Girls Unleashed, I did so with the naive belief that male victimization is quite low, and female victimization is much higher than the statistics indicate. I still believe the second half of that to be true. The first part? That’s gone…
“As emails, sent by male victims, trickled in from various places in Canada and USA, and as wives shared that their husbands are just as abused as they, often sexually, I was confronted with a daunting reality in the church. Male victimization seems to be as high, if not higher, than female victimization. At least in the Mennonite church, though I presume it is in other churches also.
“Yesterday, for the first time, I received numerous messages in one day, from wives who are exasperated by their marriages, because their husbands refuse to work through victimization. They go to church, Sunday after Sunday, in their plain–or straight cut–suits and bonnets, pretending all is well. Meanwhile these women are frantic for help, and so desperate they contemplate abandoning their husbands…”
She goes on to say that men tend to be even more silent about their sexual abuse than what women are and that hides the fact that the problem is much bigger than anything we ever imagined.
“Most wives say their husbands insist that they may not tell anyone. They refuse to get help, leaving wives feeling hopeless and angry…”
“It takes incredible humility, because of the power of false shame, for any victim to come forward. And I’m learning it takes even more courage for men. You feel as though you should have been able to stop it. You are male, after all. The stronger gender. The providers. The protectors. The ones who slay lions and bears. How could you be so weak as to surrender to abuse? Your manhood is stripped, and you will do what you must to hide that raw wound.”
http://trudymetzger.com/2012/09/27/what-if-my-husband-was-abused-too/
It is shocking that a significant number of Mennonite men have had homosexual/same-sex type of sexual abuse when they were young. The conservative element of the Mennonite church has taken a strong stance against homosexuality, and yet within their own churches and sitting in their pews are man and boys who have committed same sex acts of abuse on other boys and both are sitting in their pews silently bearing their pain and guilt.
The rate of sexual abuse is higher among Amish and conservative Mennonite groups than what most people have any idea exists, and we will be looking at the evidence. What the evidence indicates is that if you visit an Amish or conservative Mennonite church service or are somewhere where there are a lot of Amish or conservative Mennonites, up to 20-25% of the people there are carrying the hidden pain of being sexually abused. Also among the group will be those who have secretly committed the sexual abuse. Those perpetrators will be dressed just like everyone else and you won’t be able to tell who they are. But they are persons whom you do not want your child to be alone with, to babysit your child, or for them to take your young child to the bathroom during Sunday school while you sit in the adult Sunday school class.
A young Amish boy peers out the back window of a buggy. What will be the effects of his Amish upbringing on his life? Has he been, or will he be sexually abused? Will he too become a sexual predator? Or will he become a man that impacts the world for Christ?
Amish and Mennonite Women and Girls are Sexual Molesters Too
People typically think of men and boys as being the ones who are sexual molesters, but there are Amish and Mennonite women and girls who are also sexual molesters. Sexual abuse committed by Amish and Mennonite women and girls is happening at a much higher rate than what most people have any idea is happening.
Ann Peachey Detweiler, writing 10 Myths about Sexual Abuse in Anabaptist Communities addresses the myth that women and girls don’t abuse children:
“’But…women and children don’t abuse children, do they?’
“I wish I could say, ‘No.’ The truth is, not only men/boys abuse children. Anyone who has been abused has the potential to become a perpetrator. This is true for men and women of all ages. Children who’ve been abused themselves will often abuse other children without realizing what they are doing. Hurt people hurt other people. And so the abuse cycle continues to wreck lives.”
Children Are More Likely To Be Molested At Church than In a Transgender-Friendly Bathroom
Elizabeth Parker writing in the American NewsX says: “…for all of their yammering about gay marriage and public restrooms, evangelical protestant churches also have a lot to answer for.
“…a child, pre-teen or adolescent is more likely to be molested in church than in a transgender bathroom. In fact, evangelical leaders have grown concerned enough about sexual abuse in their ranks that Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment (GRACE) was launched to train, educate and help faith communities prevent this from happening. Alas, the facts revealed in a Powerpoint slide presentation show they’ve got a long slog ahead of them.
- “Child abuse accusations against US protestant churches average 70 per week. GRACE acknowledges that the number could be a lot higher due to under-reporting.
- “One percent of churches surveyed reported abuse accusations annually.
- “42 percent were volunteers, 25 percent were paid staff, 25 percent were other children.
- “The average child molester sexually assaults 50-150 children before being caught.
“What’s even scarier is that sexual abuse and child molestation may even be more likely to occur in churches due to the toxic combination of the high level of trust placed in church leaders combined with the authoritarian upbringings of many of the children in their charge. It’s hard to defend yourself against abuse when you’ve been taught to obey adults without question all your life.
If sexual abuse is so prevalent among Amish and conservative Mennonites, why don’t we hear more about it?
John J. Friesen, a retired professor from Canadian Mennonite University, and an expert on conservative Mennonite, Amish and Hutterite groups explained in an article by CBC News Manitoba that the reason we don’t hear much about sexual abuse is that the internal controls within these conservative groups keeps them from being reported.
Friesen states: “’When issues of abuse or something like that becomes public or comes before the courts, then internally something hasn’t worked.’
“’Either the discipline system isn’t functioning properly in that community or the person they attempted to discipline isn’t taking discipline.’
“’It takes a lot for someone to leave a closed community like this because they are usually leaving their family and kinship groups, and giving up financial and psychological support networks’, he said.
“’That’s a big break and not done lightly. [Leaving] would be very big because everything that’s familiar to them would then be lost, given up, and they would need to start over again, rebuilding a different life on the outside. It’s traumatic,’ Friesen said.
“’If somebody leaves and they state a reason why they left, my first inclination would be to believe them because the price they would have to pay for leaving is so high.’”
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/old-order-mennonite-sexual-abuse-allegations-1.3424523
“Children lie about sexual abuse sometimes.”
Ann Peachey Detweiler in the article, 10 Myths about Sexual Abuse in Anabaptist Communities says: “No. Don’t go there. Children do not have the sexual knowledge needed to fabricate a false story involving sexual abuse. They may not get all the details right (place, person, etc.) due to mind blocks or disassociation when they disclose an experience. But that does not mean that their story isn’t true or shouldn’t be believed.” https://abundantredemptionblog.wordpress.com/2016/08/10/10-myths-about-sexual-abuse-in-anabaptist-communities/
Next Chapter 4 – Horrific Amish and Mennonite Sexual Abuse Cases
Why Biblical Research Reports uses the KJV
When I started in-depth Bible research, I was using the NIV translation. I was not prepared for the deception and misguiding information that I found coming from Christian scholars. I did extensive research into Bible translations and into the Greek manuscripts themselves that the various versions are translated from.
I soon realized that the most significant subject facing the Church today is the Bible, what version is used and preached from, the Greek text it is translated from, and the way it is translated. Every Christian doctrine is based on the Bible. The way the Bible reads, the words that it has and the words that it does not have, the way the Greek words are translated or poorly translated, all affect the beliefs and teachings of the Church. At one point I thought that most translations of the Bible were basically the same except for the modernization of the old English in the KJV. This is not the case. Most of the modern translations do not have everything that the KJV does, as a result of changes in the Greek texts from which they are translated. In addition, significant changes have to be made in each new Bible version in order to copyright it. As a result of that research, I switched to the KJV. To read more about my Bible translation research check out these Research Reports:
Evidence the NIV is Not the Best Bible Translation
Evidence the NIV is not the best Bible translation (Condensed)
What is the Best Bible Translation?
I highly recommend the powerful, Free E-Sword Bible program for your computer, cell phone or other mobile device. Make sure you also download the free Treasury of Scripture Knowledge – cross references for each Bible verse to other verses on the same subject. For a cross reference database that is much larger and more complete consider purchasing The Ultimate Cross-Reference Treasury (in the dictionary category).
